Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
