we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Randomize