haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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