elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
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