3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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