i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
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