I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
