areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
