im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
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