Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
