i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
