I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize
