I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
