Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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