i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
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Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
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