thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
