so explain again why im purple
no
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
