just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
Randomize
