Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Randomize
