Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
