have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Randomize
