I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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