so that wasnt chicken after all
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Randomize
