Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
