You surviving the open bar?
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In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
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