i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
Randomize
