i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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