break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Randomize
