so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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