so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
Randomize