I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
