After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize