Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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