Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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