I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
i just google imaged poop.
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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