Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Randomize
