we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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