you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
