they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
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i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize