He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
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