Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Randomize
