seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
