The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
you can't exactly throw up or pass out at the pentagon so i had to pull my shit together
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize