guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Randomize
