I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
My dick has a subreddit
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
