You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
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