I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
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