I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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