Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
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She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
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We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?