you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
These 23 People Had Sex With Someone From Completely Different Cultures
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
25 Medical Facts That Need To Be Common Knowledge
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Randomize
