guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
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if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
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