So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
